Monday, September 23, 2002

Well, Since This Is Monday, I Guess This Would Be the "Monday Five"

1. Would you say that you're good at keeping in touch with people? If the other person makes the effort to keep in touch with me, I'm usually pretty good about responding, I think, but I'm really, really bad at taking the initiative and contacting people myself. Case in point: some time ago a good friend of mine from college who I'd lost touch with (even though she was still living nearby) e-mailed me and asked me to come and visit her over Christmas (or was it Thanksgiving?) and I responded very enthusiastically. We got together a couple of times, I met her fiance (who turned out to be a really great guy I hit it off with immediately), I went to their wedding. That was about, what, two years ago? And, despite multiple sincere declarations that this time we would keep in touch -- that I would come by for dinner sometime when I was in Albuquerque, that they would stop at my place if ever they were passing through Socorro, etc., etc. -- I haven't seen them since. I think I tried sending her an e-mail at some point, but it bounced. Or, actually, I think she e-mailed me and my reply bounced. And that was it. I feel kind of bad about that. Maybe I should try looking her up again. Except, even as I write this, I know I won't. Because I never do...

2. Which communication method do you usually prefer/use: e-mail, telephone, snail mail, blog comments, or meeting in person? Why? I love e-mail, for a whole host of reasons. I'm much more articulate in writing then I am when speaking, for one thing, so it's a medium of communication well suited to me. I also like the fact that I know that when I send someone e-mail, I'm not interrupting them at anything, which I always worry about when calling people on the phone. And I love the fact that I can have conversations in which there are never any awkward pauses, never any instances of both people trying to talk at once. And when something the other person says sparks a thought and you want to respond to it, you don't have to interrupt their own train of thought to do it. It's wonderful.

3. Do you have an instant messenger program? How many? Why/why not? How often do you use it? I have the software for it, I'm pretty sure, but I've never bothered activating it. Instant messaging has most of the disadvantages of telephoning and few of the advantages of e-mail, and I have very little interest in it.

4. Do most of your close friends live nearby or far away? I suppose that depends on how you define "close" in this sense. I have two types of friends, really: what I might call Real Life Friends and Internet Friends. All my Real Life Friends are at least in the same state as me, except for the ones who've drifted away and with whom I've lost touch (see question #1). My Internet Friends are scattered all over the globe. So the question is whether my Internet Friends count as close friends or not, and that's a bit hard to answer, I suppose. In terms of the sheer amount of time I spend "talking" to them, I think the Internet Friends win, and there's a person or two I know over the 'net with whom I can talk about things that I don't talk about to most of my Real Life Friends. But, on the other hand, Real Life friends will help you move, and that counts for a great deal.

5. Are you an "out of sight, out of mind" person, or do you believe that "distance makes the heart grow fonder"? As with so many things in this life, it depends.

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